Girlie men

Heavy sigh...  Could there be a less offensive mock pejorative that someone actually took offense to then “Girlie Men”?.    

The Quantum Physics of Fat

Obesity is at an epidemic level and there seems to be no end to the blame.  Is it the food industry pushing lucrative but unhealthy choices?  Is it the entertainment industry that has provided too many sedentary choices?  Is it our service based economy that requires physical labor from so few?  Is it pie?  And dare I ask: does the fault lie within us?

No, it’s none of those things.  After slap-dash research I have stumbled upon the source of the obesity epidemic. It’s Physics.   Did you know that we are accelerating?  Our planet, sun, solar system and galaxy are moving away from everything else in the universe at an ever faster rate.  Did you know that acceleration increases mass?  The more an object accelerates the more massive the object becomes.  So even though you have parked your massive butt in a chair and it seems to be doing no accelerating at all, it never-the-less gets more massive.  Your mass is increasing because everything in the Universe (including your butt and the chair it’s parked in) is flying apart at an ever increasing rate of speed.  So it’s not your fault.  It’s a fundamental law of physics.  Have some more pie.